I’ve contemplated two words a great deal in recent months: loss and miracle. Both locally and nationally, I’ve witnessed immense loss and have worked hard to come to peace with it. Our world is in a state of great unrest at the same time that the humans that I know personally have been feeling the weight of it in every way imaginable.
Here are some facts about loss that I’ve come to learn:
Loss and losing are not the same thing. I look at losing as when I choose the wrong priority and miss out on what is most important. It’s kind of hard for me to blame anyone but myself for those choices, so my natural consequence is to lose out on something that could have been more meaningful in my life. On the other hand, loss is the grief that I feel when I’m no longer able to be in contact with someone that I love.
There is absolutely no way to experience loss without pain. Loss leaves a gaping hole where there once was someone who filled a place within us that made us happy. No matter the kind of loss or what brought it on, sadness is part of the deal. Allow yourself to feel it; it is an important part of the journey to move forward.
One of the areas I’ve been inspired to grow because of all of the losses to which I’ve been connected this year is to take control of the part I have power over – not losing out on the moments with those I love – while trusting God to heal the wounds that loss leaves on my soul. That is a gift only He can give in a way that lasts.
The other word I’ve spent a great deal of time pondering and praying for is “miracle.” Watching people I care about suffer is excruciating. I’ve prayed for many miracles, and I’ve learned a lot about them along the way.
They rarely look how I think they will. God is the only one who can accomplish miracles. Every definition you take the time to look up will acknowledge the requirement of a divine entity for a miracle to happen. Like it or not, miracles are actions that He brings about to remind us of His power, love, and sovereignty. One of the most consistent prayers for a miracle that I’ve had over the last year was for Him to work a miracle in the life of a sixteen-year-old girl with cancer. I know that thousands joined me in that prayer until her last breath on earth yesterday. It was her prayer until the end as well. As I’ve pondered God’s answer to our prayer for a miracle, He’s shown me one important thing, which is the next fact about miracles I want to explore:
The scope of the effects of a miracle is far greater than my original vision. My mind can only see as far as the earth’s horizon, but the miracle that God is working through even just this one life is far greater than her life alone. The miracle that God has chosen to provide involves countless people. He’s brought about restoration, love, strength, connections, humility, generosity, gratitude, faith, and much more to a community that was given a new reason to grow in all of those ways. Shay did receive the ultimate, miraculous gift of eternal life with no more suffering, but those left behind to grieve the loss of her life on earth have the opportunity to live out the miracle that God intended for the situation all along. Of course, there’s a place in my heart that wishes the miracle I prayed for included some of my vision of what that would look like, but I’ve been through enough loss in my own life to know that my ways are not nearly as good as God’s ways, and I can trust Him to help me work through the questions that come when my definition of miracle doesn’t seem to add up with His.
I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that He is good. Always. When cancer, accidents, disease, people, and medicine are not. This is a fact I’ve only learned because of loss and miracles and how God has helped me better understand both.