I’m in a stage of life where I find myself processing a lot of things. Some of them are major life-changing things (like having another member in our family kind of major) and some of them are silly (how am I going to live with a limited amount of chocolate until this pregnancy-induced acid reflux dies down?!?).
I was talking with a sweet friend last week about the computing overload my brain seems to be on right now, and I was so encouraged and moved by her insight. She pointed out that us mamas have a natural inkling to step back from life as we know it when we are anticipating the arrival of a new child. Priorities shift and our hearts clean out clutter to make room for the growing love we have for the gift of life growing within our very bodies.
That’s where I am right now, friends. This summer has been challenging on so many levels. Sometimes when I find myself in the midst of a firey growing time, all I can do is survive, holding onto the hope that God has a purpose that will bring Him honor and be the best for my family and me. We are going to come out on the other side refined, and most of the contemplations in my hormone-heavy heart and head just need to remain in my heart and head for just me and God until we work out together. There’s so much wisdom in Ecclesiastes 3:1, 7:
“There is a time for everything,
and a season for every activity
under the heavens:
a time to be silent and a time to speak.”
And so for now I remain mostly silent, waiting for God to teach me what He wants me to see right now, for Him to be the one and only inspiration for the words I share in this space. Even as I wait, I catch glimpses of the resolution, the answers that I’m seeking, but for today I go against my natural tendency to come up with my own answers and let Him reveal His best answer.
I appreciate your prayers and patience as I choose sleep rather than writing and silence over speaking. I am really okay, grateful for God’s obvious presence in my everyday routine, I’m not feeling down and ready to give up, just contemplative. Processing. Waiting to see God’s purpose for me in this season.
Are you there, too? Please let me know in a comment or an email {kwesterf@gmail.com} if I can pray for you as we wait, think, and pray together.
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I’m right there with you, friend. Processing away. I really feel like God is calling me to be still, or more quiet, with Him these days. The constant flow of words I’ve felt the need to write for the last couple years is slowing – this is a summer of rest for me, and more full engagement with the people around me. I’m enjoying it, and glad that you are in a season of waiting and watching, too. It is always good to know that someone knows how you feel. Love that you are still popping in every once and while, though 🙂
Courtney, I’m so grateful our paths crossed in this massive blogosphere. You encourage me every time I read one of your emails or blog posts! And I, too, am glad to know I’m not alone in this season of being still.