I’ve been a mess lately. I feel raw, emotional, unworthy, and unattractive. Instead of meditating on the beauty of a life growing inside me, I note the chubbiness of my cheeks, the balloon-like ankles if I’ve been on my feet for too long, and the ever-tightening fit of my wardrobe.
Somewhere in the emotional web of lies and confusion that comes with an over abundance of hormones when growing a baby, it becomes too simple to choose crying over frivolity and guilt in the place of grace.
Yet in all of that mess, You are ever-present. Loving me just the same as when I’m striving to honor You. Stroking my head and assuring me that You make everything beautiful – even this self-centered, fickle woman who can’t always see the truth being crowded out by estrogen – is a beautiful part of Your creation.
So today I gratefully accept the invitation You share throughout Your Word as well as through beautiful women such as Sara to worship You in my every day. You make everything beautiful in Your time. It says so in Ecclesiastes 3:11.
Today I choose to not be discouraged by the things I see as messes, big or small, and cling to your promise. In doing so I’m removing the tendency to revolt at my reflection, at the never-ending piles of dishes and laundry that reappear. I am acknowledging Your presence in my everyday, and Your desire and worth to be praised in all things. You deserve my adoration rather than witnessing my constant sighing.
So I give you praise for
The clothes in my dryer waiting to be folded
The dinner dish soaking in my sink
The junk mail that has piled far too high
The pants that seem to be getting more snug than appropriate
And the toilet needing scrubbed of little boy, bad aim stink.
All of these things are my everyday messes
I can’t conquer them without Your strength
They remind me that no matter how big the mayhem may seem
You’ve blessed me with more than I need
Our home, though small and not flawless,
Is filled with more love and toys than we all deserve.
So I bow before You now with a heart that is humbled
And say Thank You for blessing us with Your artistry.
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